Mar 18, 2008
{ The cat shit has hit the fan }
-ExcellentIt’s raining. That means the freaks come in early and don’t leave all day. They just STAY in the library. All day. Can’t go outside: it’s raining.
So the guy sitting across from me on the computers has his jeans pulled down so low that it is no longer an issue of ass-crack, but complete bare-assness on the library’s wooden computer chair. Don’t people wear underwear anymore? I don’t really want to know. And somebody smells like urine…..
Then there is Mr. Entrepreneur two computers down. He knows me by name. He is here EVERY day. His floppy disk never works. He is trying to design packaging for a product that he is going to patent and make a million dollars and then he is going to take me out to dinner (he says.)
“Have you ever used this floppy before?” (as the drive buzzes, and buzzes, and fails to load.)
“Naw. I just found it in a drawer and I figured it’s grey like the other one so it has to work.”
Every time he asks me for something by waving his hand around and yelling across the library “Miss, Miss? Yoo-hoo!” I stupidly walk over to his computer, where he LAYS HIS FUCKING HAND ON MY THIGH as he asks his question. The first time he did it I wasn’t sure it was intentional. I’m sure it is, now.
Not only urine… CAT URINE. How does an adult leave their house smelling like cat urine? So I get out the Febreeze and spray down the unoccupied computers and chairs and get choruses of: “Oh man. That stuff stinks.”
Right. And cat piss is fine perfume.
There is no point to this rant. I’m just having a shitty morning.
Labels: cat piss, computer, Library, pervert, rain
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